DENISON'S ACTING PLAYS. 

A Partial List of Successful -and Popular Plays. Larife Catalogue Free. 
Price 1 5 Cents Each. Postpaid. Unless Different Price is Given. 



DRAMAS. COMEDIES. ENTER- 
TAINMENTS. Etc. 

M. F. 

After the Game, 2 acts, \li 

hrs (2Sc) 1 9 

All a Mistake, 3 acts, 2 hrs. (25c) 4 4 
All That Glitters Is Not Gold, 

u 2 acts,> 2 hrs 6 3 

I Altar of Riches, 4 acts, 21/2 hrs. 

(2Sc) 5 5 

Americf.n Hustler, 4 acts, 2J4 

hrs (2Sc) 7 4 

Arabian Nights, 3 acts, 2 hrs. . . 4 5 
Bank Cashier, 4 acts, 2 hrs. (25c) 8 4 
Black Heifer, 3 acts, 2 hrs. (25c) 9 3 

Bonnybell, 1 hr (25c).Optnl. 

Brookdale Farm, 4 acts, 2J4 hrs. 

(2Sc) 7 3 

Brother Josiah, 3 acts, 2 h. (25c) 7 4 
Busy Liar, 3 acts, 2% hrs. (25c) 7 4 

Caste, 3 acts, 2'/^ hrs 5 3 

Corner Drug Store, 1 hr. (25c) 17 14 
Cricket on the Hearth, 3 acts, 

IH hrs 7 8 

Danger Signal, 2 acts, 2 hrs... 7 4 
/ Daughter of the Desert, 4 acts, 

2'/^ hrs (25c) 6 4 

Down i.: Dixie, 4 acts, 25-2 hrs. 

(2Sc) 8 4 

East Lynne, 5 acts, 214 hrs 8 7 

Editor-in-Chief. 1 hr (25c) 10 

Elma, 1 M hrs (25c) Optnl. 

Enchanted Wood, l-H h.(3Sc) Optnl. 

Eulalia, 1^ hrs (25c) Optnl. 

Face at the Window, 3 acts, 2 

hrs (25c) 4 4 

From Sumter to Appomattox, 4 

acts, 21^ hrs (25c) 6 2 

Fun on the Podunk Limited, 

lyi hrs (2Sc) 9 14 

Handy Andy (Irish), 2 acts, 11^ h. 8 2 
Heiress of Hoetown, 3 acts, 2 

hrs (25c) 8 4 

High School Freshman, 3 acts, 

2 h (25c) 12 

Home, 3 acts, 2 hrs 4 3 

Honor of a Cowboy, 4 acts, 2J^ 

hrs (25c) 13 4 

Iron Hand, 4 acts, 2 hrs.. (25c) 5 4 
It's All in the Pay Streak, 3 

acts, IH hrs (25c) 4 3 

Jayville Junction, lyi hrs. (25c) 14 17 
Jedediah Judkins, J. P., 4 acts, 

2/2 hrs (25c) 7 5 

' Kingdom of Heart's Content, 3 

acts, 2% hrs (25c) 6 12 

Light Brigade, 40 min (25c) 10 

Little Buckshot, 3 acts, 2^4 hrs. 

(25c) 7 4 

Lodge of Kye Tyes, 1 hr.(25c)13 
Lonelyville Social Club, 3 acts, 

iVi hrs (25c) 10 



Louva, the Pauper, S acts, 2 h, . 9 4 
Man from Borneo, 3 acts, 2 hrs. 

(25c) S 2 

Man from Nevada, 4 acts, 2^2 

hrs (25c) 9 5 

Mirandy's Minstrels. . . . (25c) Optnl. 

New Woman, 3 acts, 1 hr 3 6 

Not Such a Fool as He Looks, 

3 acts, 2 hrs 5 3 

Odds with the Enemy, 4 acts, 

IH hrs 7 4 

Old Maid's Club, lyi hrs. (25c) 2 16 
Old School at Hick'ry Holler, 

1J4 hrs (25c) 12 9 

Only Daughter, 3 acts, 1% hrs. 5 2 
On the Little Big Horn, 4 acts, 

214 hrs (25c) 10 4 

Our Boys, 3 acts, 2 hrs 6 4 

Out in the Streets, 3 acts, 1 hr. 6 4 

Pet of Parson's Ranch, 5 acts, 2 h. 9 2 

School Ma'am, 4 acts, 1 J4 hrs.. 6 5 

Scrap of Paper, 3 acts, 2 hrs.. 6 6 

Seth Greenback, 4 acts, 1 % hrs. 7 3 

Soldier of Fortune, 5 acts, 2^ h. 8 3 

Solon Shingle, 2 acts, 1 'A hrs.. 7 2 

Sweethearts, 2 acts, 35 min.... 2 2 
Ten Nights in a Barroom, 5 

acts, 2 hrs 7 4 

Third Degree, 40 min (25c) 12 

Those Dreadful Twins, 3 acts, 

2 hrs (2Sc) 6 4 

Ticket-of -Leave Man, 4 acts, 2 J4 

hrs 8 3 

Tony, The Convict, 5 acts, 2V^ 

hrs (25c) 7 4 

Topp's Twins, 4 acts, 2 h..(2Sc) 6 4 

Trip to Storyland, IH hrs. (25c) 17 23 

Uncle Josh, 4 acts, 2^ hrs.(25c) 8 3 

Under the Laurels, 5 acts, 2 hrs. 6 4 
Under the Spell, 4 acts, 2}^ 

hi s (25c) 7 3 

Yankee Detective, 3 acts, 2 hrs. 8 3 

FARCES. COMEDIETTAS. Etc. 

April Fools, 30 min. 3 

Assessor, The, 10 min 3 2 

Aunt Matilda's Birthday Party, 

35 min. II 

Baby Show at Pineville, 20 min. 19 

Bad Job, 30 min 3 2 

Betsy Baker, 45 min 2 2 

Billy's Chorus Girl, 25 min... 2 3 

. Billy's Mishap, 20 min 2 3 

Borrowed Luncheon, 20 min.. 5 

Borrowing Trouble, 20 min 3 5 

Box and Cox, 35 min 2 1 

Cabman No. 93, 40 min 2 2 

Case Against Casey, 40 min... 23 
Convention of Papas, 25 min. . . 7 

Country Justice, 15 min 8 

Cow that Kicked Chicago, 20 m. 3 2 



T. S. DENISON & COMPANY. 154 W. Randolph St., Chicago 



A BURNS REBELLION 



A CONFERENCE OF THE BEST-KNOWN 

CHARACTER CREATIONS OF 

ROBERT BURNS 



BY 

Edith F. A. U. Painton 

AUTHOR OF 
'As a IVotnan Thinketh''^ and ''A Prairie Rose' 



COPYRIGHT, 1913, BY EBEN H. NORRIS. 



CHICAGO 

T. S. DENISON & COMPANY 

Publishers 



A BURNS REBELLION 



CHARACTERS. 

Tam O'Shanter Master of Ceremonies 

SouTER Johnny ' His Cronie 

The Old Cotter. . . .From "The Cotter's Saturday Night" 

Jenny's Lover 

The Reverend Sage. .From "Man Was Made to Mourn" 

The Deil From "Death and Dr. Hornbroo-k" 

Rab the Ranter Burns' Familiar Name for Himself 

Duncan Gray 

Jenny The Old Cotter's Daughter 

Highland Mary Burns' Lost Love 

Bonnie Jean Burns' Wife 

Kate Wife of Tam O'Shanter 

Maggie Duncan Gray's Sweetheart 

Time of Playing — About One Hour. 

COSTUMES. 

Where it is possible to procure any of the many pictures 
that have been made of these several characters, the cos- 
tumes may be easily copied and arranged from them. The 
following suggestions may be of some assistance where 
the more complete portrayal cannot be easily obtained: 

Tam O'Shanter — Make as grotesque as possible. Fan- 
tastic colors. 

SouTER Johnny — Much the same style as Tam, but 
more sober in color. 

The Old Cotter — Rough suit, ill-fitting and shabby. 
Carries cap awkwardly in both hands and fingers it ner- 
vously whenever speaking, looking around in embarass- 
ment. His hoe and spade rest against the wall behind him, 
as though he had stopped to the "conference" on his way 
home from work. 

4 



A BURNS REBELLION. 5 

Jenny — Simple peasant dress, jacket and cap. 

Jenny^s Lover — "A strappin' youth/' simply clad in 
peasant garb. Appears bashful and ill at ease. 

Highland Mary — A blue-eyed, light-haired lassie, in 
modest colors. Her peasant dress is short, her hair flowing. 

Bonnie Jean — A black-eyed lassie in a red dress, peas- 
ant style, with red Scotch cap. 

The Reverend Sage — Long white beard and hair. 
Dressed poorly. Walks very feebly, leaning over cane. He 
must be determined upon being heard and speak in a 
querulous, fault-finding tone. 

The Deil — Usual garb of Mephisto in black and red. 
Carries pitchfork. 

Rab the Ranter — Copy the pictures of the poet as 
closely as possible. 

Kate — Large, fierce woman, made to look much like an 
ugly witch. 

Duncan Gray — Very young lad, dressed with flashy and 
extravagant taste. 

Maggie — Elaborately dressed, in contrast to the simplicity 
of the other girls. Wears bonnet. Very vain and coquet- 
tish. 



SYNOPSIS FOR PROGRAM. 

The call to order. Old cronies. The Cotter's protest 
sets a big ball rolling. "A' that he writ o' 'Bonnie Jean' is 
sweet to tell." Love's story re-told, with varying effect. 
"The Wooin' o't." "Man was made to mourn." The Deil's 
prompt arrival. "No chance for me !" The bard's arrival 
and a sudden change of tune. "Rue that he made us?" 
Two loves at once. Tam's attempt to escape, and the inter- 
position of Kate. The bard's own story. "Fare ye week" 



A BURNS rb:bellion. 



STORY OF THE PLAY. 



The characters created by Burns have met together in 
council to celebrate his fame, although protesting against 
the necessity, because it does the poet no good, and also 
because he does not deserve it, anyway. Each enters his 
little protest over the character the bard has given him to 
carry through all the ages, and they finally resolve to 
summon the Deil to their assistance, who straightway 
appears and expresses his willingness to serve them, be- 
cause of the trouble the poet is giving to him since passing 
into the realm of shades. 

They finally ask that the Deil shall summon the poet 
to answer them in person for the wrongs he has done 
them; but as soon as he appears and challenges them, they 
are ready to back out of their bargain and retract every 
complaint they have been making. Tam O'Shanter's uneasi- 
ness is further increased by the arrival of his wife, Kate, 
who berates him so unmercifully that he begs of the Deil 
to take him back. Matters are at last satisfactorily straight- 
ened out by the bard's assumption of authority, and his 
own jolly good nature's assertion of its own, and the coun- 
cil breaks up in the celebration of "Auld Lang Syne." 



Music to all the ballads used in this play may be found in 
the book "Songs o-f Scotland," which we will send post- 
paid upon the receipt of price, 50 cents. 



A BURNS REBELLION 



Scene: A lodge room. Only one entrance necessary. 
A long table in center of stage. About this table are seated 
all the characters used, with the exception of Rab the 
Ranter, The De-il, Jenny's Lover and Kate, Tam 
O'Shanter being at the head of the table and Souter 
Johnny at foot. The first stan::a of "Aidd Lang Syne" is 
sung behind scenes, the curtain rising on the singing of 
the chorus. After a pause, during which all settle dozvn 
in- seats comfortably and look inquiringly at Tam O'Shan- 
ter_, he rises and raps on table with gavel. 
Tam O'Shanter. 

We folks o' Burns, both fact and fable. 
Now gathered 'round this festive table, 
To celebrate as weel's we're able 

The bard wha made us, 
Let's tell our tales, baith wild and stable, 
As they hae bade us. 

{Sits again.) 
SouTER Johnny. 

Ay, Tam O'Shanter, that we'll do, sir! 
Tam {jumping up again). 

Why, Souter Johhny, is that you, sir? 
Johnny. 

Ay, — Souter Johnny, just as true, sir, 
As Burns e'er wrote it! 
Tam {motioning to seat at his right hand). 
Then come up here, as you should do, sir. 
That a' may note it ! 

(Johnny walks slowly to chair indicated.) 
Here at my elbow, "Souter Johnny, 
My ancient, trusty, drouthie cronie ; 

{Introducing him.) 
7 



8 A BURNS REBELLION. 

I've lo'ed him like a very brither ; 
We hae been fou for weeks thegither." 
Johnny {bowiny to crowd as introduced). 
Ay, that we hae! (Sits and turns to Tam.) But what's 

th.e ca' 
For what you've gathered ane and a' 
To meet in council in this ha' 

On this occasion? 
Was it mere friendly drink and brawl? 

^ (Tam hangs head.) 

Come, — no evasion! 

Tam (slapping Johnny on shoidder). 

Ah, you're a sly old dufifer, Johnny! 

Mmd, I'm not saying you're na funny, 

Nor that this head (patting head) holds not fu' monv 

A crafty notion; 
But this time you're aflf, my cronie, 

In your devotion! 
The truth is, we're a' Burns' creations, 
And so, of course, somewhat relations,' 

T (Bows to company.) 

Jommg m a' the celebrations ^ - ^ 

The world gi'es to him; 
I think they're a' abominations! 

Johnny (nodding assent emphatically). 
Sma' guid ihey do him ! 

Cotter. 

Iiideed, that's true; but tell me how much more 

Does he deserve when once you think it o'er? 

He s writ me down a "Cotter" in such ways 

That now I must be cotter all my days • ' 

In vain do_ I protest! (Sighs.) The wo'rld so bright 

h.yes envymgly, 'The Cotter's Saturday Night " 

And a men would be cotters,— so they say ! 

So, still I "hameward bend" my wearv way! (b) 

Reverend Sage (rising feebly and resting on cane, qes- 
tnres fiercely). ' ^ 



A BURNS REBELLION. 9 

"The sun that overhangs yon moors, (c) 

Out-spreading far and wide, 
Where hundreds labour to support 

A haughty lordHng's pride ; 
I've seen yon weary winter-sun 
Twice forty times return; 
And every time has added proofs 
That man was made to mourn." 
Highland Mary Xgoes to him and gently leads him to 
his seat). 

"Is there for honest poverty, (d) 
That hangs its head, an' a' that? 
The coward slave, we pass him by — 

We dare be poor for a' that ! 
For a' that, and a' that. 

Our toil's obscure, and a' that, 
The rank is but the guinea's stamp, 
A man's a man for a' that!" 

{Resumes seat.) 
Cotter (sadly). 

Ay, Highland Mary, quite so in your sight ! 
You died, and went to heaven — so he seid ! 
(Looks around circle for confirmation and all nod assent.) 
So what mair things he wrote, or did not write, 
Could not concern you after ye were deid ! 
Tam. 

You puir old Cotter! — 'tis a pity 
He e'er writ that mournfu' ditty, 
That branded ye through lane and city 

A cotter ever! 
Nae turn of fate, h.owe'er sae witty, 
Your lot could sever! 

But, — (sighs, shaking head) think ance of the repu- 
tation 
I carry on through ilka nation. 
Where my puir story finds relation ! 



10 A BURNS REBELLION. 

I'm Tarn O'Shanter! 
Wha names me, save wi' exclamation 
O' mocking- banter? 

They blaw o' my carousals duly, 
O' my wild ride on steed, unruly, 
O' ghosts and goblins, — witches, — truly 

A likely story! 
But do they add ane guid thing newly 

To bring me glory ? 

What think ye, Bonnie Jean? No doot, ma'am, 
Our honest words hae put ye oot, ma'am : 
His wife, of course, kens mair aboot, ma'am, 

His work than we ! 
I'm jeest an ignorant country lout, ma'am, 

As ye can see. 

Bonnie Jean {meekly). 

I dinna ken wha' ye a' mean ; 

I ken my Robbie's wit waur keen. 

But I'm weel pleased wi' a' I've seen 

Aboot mysel' ! 
A' that he writ o' "Bonnie Jean" 

Is sweet to tell. 

(A knock at the door. Jenny jumps up as though startled 
and then hangs head bashfully twisting dress) . 

Johnny. 

"But hark! A rap comes gently to the door!" (b) 

(All look at Jenny zvith interest, noticing her embar- 
rassment. Tam and Johnny exchange glances of amuse- 
ment.) 

Cotter (a trifle sternly). 

"Jenny, ken ye the meaning of the same?" 
Jenny (hesitatingly). 

'Tis jeest "a neebor lad came o'er the moor. 

To do some errands, and convoy me hame." 



A BURNS REBELLION. 11 

"Is there, in human form, that bears a heart, 

A wretch ! a villain ! lost to love and truth ! 
That can, with studied, sly, ensnariug art. 

Betray sweet Jenny's unsuspecting youth?" 
Tam (angrily). 

"Curse on his perjur'd arts! Dissembling smooth!" 
Sage (indignantly). 

"Are honor, -virtue, conscience, all exil'd?" 
Mary (sadly). 

"Is there no pity, no relenting ruth. 
Points to that parent {points Cotter) fondling o'er 
his child?" 
(All think seriously for a moment, wondering Iwzc to 
meet the situation. The knock is repeated at door. All 
look up.) 

Tam (with authority). 

"With kindly welcome, Jenny, bring him ben." 
Jenny goes to door and admits Lover. He is very 
bashful, hut she takes him by the arm and leads him to the 
Cotter. 
Tam. 

"A strapping youth, he'll take the father's eye!" 
(The Cotter rises and looks him over very critically, at 
last extending his hand to the Lover.) 
Jean (to Mary). 

"Blythe Jenny sees the visit's no ill ta'en." 
Mary (nodding in reply). 

And "The youngster's artless heart o'erflows with joy." 
Cotter (still holding Lover's hand, turns ^o. Jenny). 
"Weel pleased your mother'll hear, it's nae wild, worth- 
less rake !" 
All (nodding approval, eagerly). 

Ay! Ay! 
Cotter (sitting again, z^'itli air of relief). 

"Weel pleased to think my bairn's respected like the 
lave." 



A BURNS REBELLION. 
Tam. 

But "What makes the youth sae bashful and sae 



grave i 



/.im)°™ ^''^'^d'^ly 'ii^ and pulls Jenny down bestde 

"O happy love! Where love like this is found I" 
Jenny (nestling to him). 

"O heartfelt raptures! bliss beyond compare'" 
Tam (points to them, chucklmg in taunting derision). 

wad some Power the giftie gie us (e) 
io see oursels as ithers see us!" 

Sage (nodding seriously). 

"It wad frae monie a blunder free us, 
An' foolish notion." 
Johnny (rising and looking defianth at Taai) 

1 ve paced much this weary, mortal round, (b) 
And sage experience bids me this declare •— 

If lieaven a draught of heavenly pleasure spare, 

One cordial m this melancholy vale, 
lis when a youthful, loving, modest pair, 

' (Points to Jenny and Lover ) 
In other s arms, breathe out the tender tale " 
(Tam scowls at him. All hut Tam clap hands. Johnny 
bows his thanks comically and resumes seat Duncan Gray 
puts arm slyly around Maggif ) 

"Duncan Gray came here to woo!" (r) 
All (chant or sing teasinglv). 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't! 
Taai (In disgust). 

On biythe, warm night when we are fu' ' 
All (as before). 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't ! 
(Maggie jumps up petulanth, tosses head scornfullv 



' 



A BURXS REBELLION. 13 

Jean. 

Maggie coost her head fu' high, 

Look'd asklent and unco skeigh, — 
Mary {nods, and speaks sympathetically, watching pair). 

Gart poor Duncan stand abeigh — 
All — 

_ Ha, ha, the wooin' o't! 

(Duncan lays hand on Maggie's arm pleadingly. She 
shakes it off. He drops head sadly). 
Lover. 

Duncan fleech'd, and Duncan prayed. 
All. 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't ! 
Jenny. 

Meg's as deaf as Ailsa Craig! 
All. 

Ha, h.a, the wooin' o't! ~ . 

(Duncan sighs deeply.) 
Lover. 

Duncan sighs baith out and in. 
Duncan {nods to Lover, and wipes eyes, zvhining). 

Greets his e'en baith bleer't an' bhn' ! 
ALvggie (sarcastically, looking at him scornfully). 

Speaks o' lowpin' o'er a Hnn — ! ! 
All. 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't ! 
Sage. 

Time and Chance are but a tide. (Sighs.) 
All. 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't ! 
Cotter (shaking head portentiously). 

SHghted love is sair to bide ; 
All. 

Ha, h.a, the wooin' o't! 
Duncan (turns from her angrily). 

Shall I like a fool— -what? me? — 

For a haughty hizzie dee? 



14 A BURNS REBELLION. 

(Walks back to place.) 
She may gae to — France— for me ! 
All (clapping hands in approval). 
Ha, ha, the wooin' o't! 

_( Maggie clasps hands, sadly looks doivn, sighs, droops 
zvipes eyes.) ' 

Johnny (points to her with satisfaction). 
~ How it comes, let doctors tell. 
Ai.L (nodding approval). 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't! 
Tam (greatly pleased, chuckles gleefully). 

Meg grows sick as he grows hale ! 
All. 

Ha, h.a, the wooin' o't! 

Maggie (clasps hands at breast, and looks at Duncan 
sadly). 

Something in my bosom wrings ! (Si^hs, turns azmv 
again.) 
Mary (sympathetically). 

For relief, a sigh she brings ! 
(Maggie looks over shoulder at Duncan, very sweetly.) 
Duncan (rises to return to her). 

And O ! her een they speak sic things ! 
All (clapping hands as he goes to her). 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't ! 
Jenny (approvingly). 

Duncan is a lad of grace! 
All. 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't ! 
Lover. 

Well, Maggie's was a piteous case. 
All. - 

Ha, ha, the wooin' o't ! 
Duncan (to Maggie, tenderly). 

Lass, I canna be thy death I 

Swelling pity smoors my wrath! (Embraces her.) 



A BURNS REBELLION. - IS 

Jenny (nestles to Lover, contentedly). 
Now they're crouse and canty baith ! 
All. 

Ha, ha ! the woin' o't I 
Tam (rises and raps table with gavel. Speaks sarcas- 
tically). 

Weel, gin love's na ower strong attraction, 
I think it's time we take some action 
To voice our great dissatisfaction 

Wi' our auld bard. 
Who drives us to sic sair distraction 
Wi' fates sae hard! 
Sage (has stood eyeing Lover very keenly while both 
Johnny and Tam have been speaking, nozv ivalks to the 
youth, hobbling zvith great difficidty and lays hand on his 
shoulder). 

''Young stranger, whither wanderest thou?" (c) 
All (looking at one another in amasement). 

O hear the reverend sage! 
(Lover has dropped head timidly.) 
Sage. 

"Does thirst of weahh thy step constrain?" 
(Pauses for reply, but Lover looks tenderly at Jenny 
aiid says nothing.) 

"Or youthful pleasures rage? ^ ^-^'^ 

Or haply, prest with cares and woes, 

Too soon thou hast began 
To wander forth, with me to mourn 

The miseries of man." 
Tam (pulls Sage back to seat). 

Down there, auld sage — or saint or sinner — 
Spread a' that gab a wee bit thinner ! 
For auld and young at talk's big dinner 

Maun take their turns I 
We're here to plot, and come out winner 

O'er Robert Burns ! 
^ (Returns to table and speaks to crowd again.) 



16 A BURNS REBELLION. 

Noo, speak, puir slaves of Burns' invention, 
And we wi' gie our best attention 
To forming definite intention 

This vera night ! 
Our wrongs hae a' had proper mention, — 
Now we maun fight. 
Johnny (jumping up eagerly). 

The Deil ! the Deil ! We'll ca' the Deil ! 
Tam (pounds table excitedly). 

That's what we will ! 
All (jumping up). 

We will ! We will ! 
Johnny. 

We'll summon him aff-hand, and he'll 

Gae straight and fetch him ! 
To account for iyka wrang and ill ! 
Tam (significantly). 
Gin he can catch him ! 

(The Deil appearing - suddenly.) 
Deil. 

Speak o' the Deil, — and he is near! 
Breathe but my name, — and I'll appear! 
Wha took my name in vain in here, 

Midst a' this clatter? 
Come, — pour into my listening ear 
Jeest what's the matter? 
(A pause, during which all look at Tam expectantly. 
He hesitates, with head hanging. All tremble and look 
badly frightened. The Sage at last steps forivard and ex- 
tends both hands to Deil in appeal.) 
Sage. 

"O Deil! the poor man's dearest friend, (c) 

The kindest and the best! 
Welcome the hour my aged limbs 

Are borne by thee to rest! 
The great, the wealthy fear thy blow, 

(Points to others.) 
From pomp and pleasure torn. 



A BURNS REBELLION. 17 

But ok! a blest relief to those 
That weary laden mourn!" 
Deil. 

Weel, weel, auld man, life maun be rough, 
Or ye maun take it mighty tough, 
To feed me a' that sweetened stuff, — 
The Deil I am ! 

(Bows low.) 
Sit down and rest. I've sure enough 
To hear from Tam ! 

(Turns to Tam again, who again drops head. The Deil 
fakes a step tozvard him threateningly. Tam shakes zvith 
fear and speaks tremblingly.) 

Tam. 

Deil, ye've great power, — of course we know it; 
But noo's a chance for ye to show it ; ' 

^ If o'er death's path, once forced to go it, 
Man e'er returns, 
Summon from out the past our poet. 
Bold Robert Burns! 
Deil. 

Ay, that I will ! I'll gladly loose him, 
And bring him forth for ye to use him ! 
I only hope that ye'll abuse him 

As he deserves ! 
Nae punishment wad I refuse him, — 
He's on my nerves ! 

Nae reverence that lad doth feel ; 
Nae matter what goes crosswise, he'll 
Begin his daffy rhymes to reel 

Aff, bold and free ; 
He gi'es a' men the very deil ! — 

Nae chance for- me ! 

Tam {impudently). 

'Twas na for your sake we were carin' ! 



18 A BURNS REBELLION. 

DiciL (angrily). 

"Ah, Tarn! Ah Tarn! Thou'U get thy fairin'-! (a) 
In hell they'll roast thee like a herrin ! 

In vain thy Kate" 
For thee and thine auld nag's appearin', 

Tonight may wait! 

Auld Maggie's speediest, maddest reel — 
And puir auld Meg, she runs right weel, — 
But though thy whip her back may feel, 

"Her ain gray tail" (a) 
Could never save thee from the Deil, 
To weep and wail ! 

But Burns ye want, — then Burns shall meet ye, 
And for his mony sins shall greet ye ; 
I hae nae doot but he will beat ye 
■ At your ain banter! 

(Calls.) 
Come forth ! See how your ain folks treat thee, 
Auld Rab the Ranter! 

Rab the Ranter entering suddenly ivith jaunty szving 
Rab the Ranter. 

"I'll be merry and free, (f) 
I'll be sad for naebody; 
Naebody cares for me, 
I care for naebody." 

(Looks around the company defiantly, who cower and 
look frig^Uened and guilty.) 

What's this? Rebellion running riot 
In my brain family ? All be quiet ! 
I made ye a' — I'll nae deny 't^ 

For, faith, I'm proud on 't! 
If brawl ye want, come on and try it! 
I'll stand the crowd on 't! 
(Looks around with a challenging air, but no one 
responds.) 



A BURNS REBELLION. 19 

Johnny {looking at 1 \m and chuckling). 

See "how Tarn stands like ane bewitched, (a) 
And thinks his very een enriched ! 

(Turns to Deil and chuckles louder than ever.) 
Even Satan glowers and fidges fu' fain, 
And hotches and blows wi' might and main." 
Tam (aside). 

"Till first ae caper, syne anither, — (a) 
Tam, tint thy reason a' thegither!" 

(Looks at Deil and laughs tauntingly.) 
"Tonight a child might understand, 
The Deil had business on his hand." 
Cotter (seriously). 

"The Lord preserve us frae the Deil ! (g) 
All. 

Amen ! Amen ! 
.Sage (hobbles forzvard and speaks angrily, pointing 
fiercely to Rab^ as to scorn him). 

"If I'm designed young lordling's slave, (c) 

By his oivn lazv designed, 
Why was an independent wish 
E'er planted in my mind? 
If not, why am I subject to 

His cruelty or scorn? 
Or why has Burns the will and power 
To make his creatures mourn?" 
(Rab looks at him steadily a minute and he turns sadly 
aivay and resumes seat, burying head in han-ds.) 
Rab (turning to others). 

But hoo maun time we're needless takin' ! 
What's the complaint ye've a' been makin'? 
(He looks at each in turn, but no one ventures to an- 
szver. Then he speaks sarcastically.) 

"O ye, wha are sae guid yoursel, (h) 

Sae pious and sae holy, 
Ye've naught to do but mark and tell 
Your neebour's fauts and folly; ... 



20 A BURNS REBELLION. 

One point must still be greatly dark, 

The moving ivhy they do it; 
And just as lamely can ye mark 
How far perhaps they rue it." 
Johnny. 

Ah, marked ye that, ye fiction creatures, 
Who owe his pen your forms and features? — 
He said, with voice like any preacher's. 

That he might "rue it!" 
Rue that he made us? Think, O screechers, 
Ye've made him to it! 
Rab. 

Still, still more time we're needless takin' ! 
(Speaks very slozvly and imperatively looking at all.) 
What's the — complaints — you've — a — been makin' ? 
Tam (hastily). 

O — naething! naethingi 
Johnny (chuckling teasingly). 

"Kings may be blest but Tam is glorious, (a) 
O'er a' the ills o' life victorious !" 
Sage (again rising and forcing Rab to listen, pointing 
to Cotter). 

"See yonder poor, o'erlabour'd wight, (c) 

So abject, mean and vile. 
Who begs a brother of the earth 

To give him leave to toil ; 
That Man, whose heaven-erected face 

The smiles of love a-dorn, — 
Man's inhumanity to man 

Makes countless thousands mourn!" 
Cotter (raises hand to stop him from saying more and 
speaks protestingly. The poet's attitude has m-ade him see 
his "wrongs" in a new light.) 

"Why, from lives like mine old Scotia's grandeur 
springs, (b) 
That makes her loved at home, revered abroad; 
Princes and lords are but the breath of kings ; 
An honest man's the noblest work of God." 



A BURNS REBELLION. 21 

r 
Jenny (stepping close to him). 

And I'm glad to be your rustic Jenny! 
Lover (stepping beside her). 

And I, the lover's role to carry! 
Mary. 

And I am proud among so many 
To still be Robert's "Highland Mary." 
(Rab turns to Mary^ as if seeing her for the first time, 
and zvalks very slowly and dreamily tozvard her. Off 
scenes, "Flozu Gently, Szveet Afton" is sung softly.) 
"Flow gently, sweet Afton, among thy green braes ! 
Flow gently, I'll sing thee a song in thy praise ! 
My Mary's asleep by thy murmuring stream — 
Flow gently, sweet Afton, disturb not her dream !" 
Rab (stands behind Mary, his hand on her shoulder, 
■until the mipsic ceases. Then, still holding position, he 
recites:) 

"How sweetly bloomed the gay, green birk, (i) 

How rich the hawthorn's blossom, 
As underneath their fragrant shade, 

I clasp'd her to my bosom! 
The golden hours on angel wings 
Flew o'er me and my dearie ; 
For dear to me as light and life 

Was my sweet Highland Mary." 
(Mary has stood with her head bent bashfully zvhile he 
recited this stansa. She nozv looks coquettishly at him 
over shoulder. He smiles tenderly and adds:) 
"Yes, still within my bosom's core 
Shall live my Highland Mary." 
Jean (has been watching closely,— nozv tosses head tri- 
umphantly.) 

Well, friends, in spite of this display 

Towards his first love which we've just seen, 
I'm very glad that I can say, 

I'm still my husband's "Bonnie Jean." 
Rab (turns to her quickly as though greatly surprised). 
Why, I've a wife of my ain." (f) 



22 A BURNS REBELLION. 

(Walks quickly and eagerly to her, putting hand on her 
shoulder.) 

"She is a winsome wee thing, (j) 
She is a handsome wee thing, 
She is a lo'esome wet thing. 

This sweet wee wife o' mine." 
(Jean turns and looks at Mary jealously, and he adds). 
"I never saw a fairer, 
I never lo'ed a dearer." 
(Jean looks up at him and smiles.) 
"There was a lass, and she was fair! (s) 

At kirk and market to be seen, 
When a' our fairest maids were met, 
The fairest maid was Bonnie Jean." 
Jean. 

"And didna Jean's yonng heart loiip hght. 

An' didna joy bHnk in her e'e, 
As Robbie tauld a tale o' love 

Ane evening on the lily lea?" 
Rab. 

"While monie a bird sang sweet o' love, 

And monie a flower blooms o'er the dale. 
My cheek to hers I aft did lay, 

And whispered thus my tender tale : — 
'O Jeannie fair, I lo'e thee dear. 

O canst thou think to fancy me? 
Or wilt thou leave thy mammie's cot. 

And learn to tent the farms wi' me? 
At barn or byre thou shalt na drudge. 
Or naething else to trouble thee. 
But stray amang the heather-bells, 

An' tent the waving corn wi' me !' " 
Jean {coquettishly). 

Now what could artless Jean then do? 
She had na will to say him na ! 
Rab. 

So at length she blushed a sweet consent, 
And love is ay between us twa !" 



J A BURNS REBELLION. 23 

Sage (in gntmbling tone). 

"A few seem favorites of Fate, (b) 
In Pleasure's lap caressed!" 
Rab (walks to Sage and puts hand on shoulder). 
"It's no in titles nor in rank; (k) 
It's no in wealth like Lon'on Bank, 
To purchase peace and rest. 

If happiness hae not her seat 
An' center in the breast, 
We may be wise, or rich, or great. 
But never can be blest ! 
- Nae treasures nor pleasures 

Could make us happy lang; 
The heart ay's the part ay 

That makes us right or wrang."' 
Deil (scornfully). 

"Some books are lies frae end to end." (1) 
Rab (facing him and looking at him masterfully). 

"And some great lies were never penn'd!" 
Deil (drops head and turns azvay, then looks hack defi- 
antly.) 

But sic a fool — (points Sage). 
Rab- (holds up hand to stop him and interrupts relnih- 
ingly, shoiving the Sage much deference). 
"His aged step (c) 

Seems weary, worn with care; 
His face is Jurrowed o'er with years, 
And hoary is his hair." 
Deil (turns to Tam, speaking sarcastically). 
Weel, what frae Tam? Hae he repented? 
These ithers seem right weel contented! 
Tam (uneasily). 

I maun be aff ! I've stayed owre while. 
And there is mony a weary mile 
"That lies between us and our hame, (a) 
Whare sits our sulky, sullen dame, 



1 



24 A BURNS REBELLION. 

Gathering her brows Hke gathering storm, 
And nursing her wrath to keep it warm:" 
"Nae man can tether time or tide ; 
The hour approaches Tam maun ride." 

{He starts to leave, hoping to escape.) 
Deil {detaining him). 

Nae, — na sae fast ! Ye ca'ed this meetin' ! 
Noo face it out and take your beatin' ! 
(Tam trembles and makes many grimaces and gestures 
in the Deil''s grasp.) 

Johnny {laughing ivickedly). 

"O Tam, hadst thou but been sae wise, 
As ta'en thy ain wife Kate's advice! 
She tauld thee weel — " 
(Kate suddenly rushes in and speaks zvith great bluster 
and ferocity, shaking her fist at Tam, wJio dodges zvith 
each shake.) 
Kate. 

"thou art a skellum, (a) 
A blethering, blustering, drunken blellum; 
Why, frae November till October, ) 

Ae market-day thou was nae sober ; 
{Grabs him from the Deil, zvho renounces him zviUiugly 
and stands back zvith folded arms, smiling sardonically, 
zvhile she shakes him like a rat.) 
Ay, ilka melder wi' the miller, 
Thou sat as lang as thou had siller; 
And every naig was ca'd a shoe on, 
, The smith and thee gat roaring f ou on ; 
Right in the Lord's house, even on Sunday, 
Thou drank wi' Kirkton Jean till Monday. 
I've told thee aft, that, late or soon. 
Thou wouldst be found deep drown'd in Doon, 
Or catched wi' warlocks in the mirk 
By Alloway's auld haunted kirk!" 
(Pauses for breath. Tam stretches out hands to Deil 
in appeal.) 



A BURNS REBELLION. 25 

Tam. 

guid kind Deil, — Auld Nickie-Beii, 

1 prithee, take me back again ! 

Deil (shaking head — arms still folded). 

Nae, nae, thy Kate is doing weel ! 

I think she really beats the Deil! 
Rab (assists Tam away from Kate and stands between 
them). 

Be kind to Tam, — puir fellow ! — Kate ; 

The Deil himself earns nae sic fate ! 

Tam called this meeting here for glory ; 

Noo, bide a wee, and hear my story: 

"There was a lad was born in Kyle, (m) 

But whatna day, o' whatna style, 

I doubt it's hardly worth the while 
To be sae nice wi' Robin. 

"Our monarch's hindmost year but ane 
Was five-and-twenty days begun, 
'Twas then a blast of Janwar' win' 
Blew hansel in on Robin. 

"The gossip keekit in his loof. 
Quo' scho : 'Wha lives will see the proof, 
This wily boy will be nae coof : 
I think we'll ca' him Robin. 

"He'll hae misfortunes great an' sma'. 
But ay a heart aboon them a'. 
He'll be a credit to us a' ; 

We'll a' be proud o' Robin.' " 

(Bows lozv, then turns to the Deil.) 
"An now, Auld Cloots, I ken ye're thinkin' (n) 
A certain Bardie's rantin' drinkin, 
Some luckless hour will send him linkin 

To your Black Pit; 
But, faith! he'll turn a corner jinkin, 
^ An' cheat you yet. 






26 A BURXS REBELLION. 

"But fare-you-weel, Auld Nickie-Ben ' 
O, wad ye take a thought an' men'! 
Ye aiblins might— I dinna ken- 
Still hae a stake: 
I'm wae to think upo' yon den, 
-Even for your sake!" 

(^^^^ to Tam and slaps him on shoulder.) 
"Fareweel, auld birkie! Lord be near ye fo) 
And then the Deil, he daurna steer ye! ' 
Your friends ay love, your foes ay fear ye' 

For me, shame fa' me. 
If neist my heart I dinna wear ye 
While Burns they ca' me!" 

{Smiles mischievously. ) 
But ere I take my leave, indeed, 
Old Tam, ye "mother's son. take heed: (a) 
Whene'er to drink you are inclined, 

{Shakes finger at him warning.) 
Or cutty sarks run in your mind. 
Think! Ye may buy the joys o'er dear:— ■ 
All {pointing zvarningly at Tam). 

Remember Tam O'Shanter's mare!" 
Sage {shaking head and muttering to himself). 
"Man's inhumanity to man (c) 

Makes countless thousands mourn." 

Rab {mischievously, emphasizing the references to 
yoiitii). 

"Yet let not this too much, my son. 

_ Disturb thy youthful breast; 
This partial viev^^ of human-kind 

Is surely not the last! 
The poor, oppress'd, honest man 
Had never, sure, been born, 
Had there not been some recompense 
To comfort those that mourn!" 



A BURNS REBELLION. 27 

{Turns to Mary.) 
"Will ye go to the Indies, my Mary, (p) 

And leave auld Scotia's shore? 
Will ye go to the Indies, my Mary, 

Across the Atlantic roar?" 
{She shakes head. He tosses his head independently.) 
"I've a wife of my ain." (f) 
"O this is no my ain lassie, 

Fair though the lassie be : 
Weel ken I my ain lassie — 

Kind love is in her e'e." {Glances at Jean ten- 
derly.) 
"She's bonnie, blooming, straight and tall, 
And' lang has had my heart in thrall ; 
And ay it charms my very saul, 

The kind love that's in the e'e." 
But — {looks Mary, and sighs deeply). 
"1 hae sworn by the Heavens to my Mary, (p) 

I hae sworn to the Heavens to be true, 
And sae may the Heavens forget me, 

When I forget my vow. 
(Pleadingly.) 
O plight me your faith, my Mary, 

And plight me your lily-white hand ! 
O plight me your faith, my Mary, 

Before I leave Scotia's strand." 
(She still shakes head. He again tosses head.) 
"I've a wife of my ain." (f) 
{Crosses to Jean, takes her arm zvith proprietary air.) 
"A thief sae pawkie is my Jean, (t) 
To steal a blink by a' unseen ! 
But gleg as light are lover's een, 

When kind love is in the e'e!" 
{Faces the others.) 
"Now, fare ye weel, and joy be wi' you! (q) 
For my sake, this I beg it o' you : 



28 A BURNS REBELLION. 

Assist the Cotter all you can; 
You'll find him just an honest man. 
Sae I conclude, and quat my chanter. 
Yours, saint or sinner, 
Rab the Ranter." 
{Bows low as they form ^circle around him and Jean 
and break into chorus of "Atdd Lang Syne" as curtain 
falls.) 

Curtain. 



The Women Who Did 

By MARY WOLCOTT GREEN, A. B. Regent, Staten Island Chap- 
ter, D. A. R. 

Price, 25 Cents 

Dramatic entertainment for women, histoi-ical and patriotic; 
17 females. Time, 1 liour. A beautiful, instructive anql interest- 
ing play in which great women of history appear. Easy to pro- 
duce. Instructions are given for making the costumes at home 
with little expense. The author has produced it many time? with 
great success at D. A. R. entertainments. It is suitable for al- 
most any occasion. 

"A tlever and unique entertainment was given by the Staten 
Island Chapter D. A. R;- on Friday evening. The main feature 
was a play, 'The Women Who Did.' The characters representing 
women of many centuries and countries, formed a living picture, 
while the dialogue was bright and true to history." — Staten Is- 
land Star. 



The Fifteenth of January 

By LINDSEY BARBEE. 

Price, 25 Cents 

College comedy, 3 acts; 11 males, 10 females. Time, 214 hours. 
Scenes: 1 interior, 1 exterior. Characters: Jack Wilson, an army 
offlcer. Dick Sherman, who becomes Peter, a deaf mute. Count 
Cassavelli, an Italian adventurer. Prof. James, Prof. Burton and 
Ted Allen, of the faculty. Billy, Chuck, Tom and Don, students. 
Frank, a little brother. Barbara, whose specialty is Billy. Doris, 
an heiress. Elsie, from Butte. Ruth, Dolly and Polly, lively stu- 
dents. Tabitha, a college gossip. Sally, from next door. Mrs. 
Meredith, an ambitious mother. Maggie, a servant. 

SYNOPSIS. 

Act I — Billy is despondent. "Don't flunk, Billy." Barbara to 
the rescue. The plot. Dick resolves to become a deaf mute with 
the name of Peter. An ambitious mama. "Money to burn!" The 
promise. Story of the Prince, Princess and Dragon. "And they 
lived happily ever after!" 

Act II. — A deaf mute who hears and sees. Lip language and 
love. Tabitha becomes suspicious. Billy wins the game for the 
team. Jack wins Doris' promise to wed him on the Fifteenth of 
January. "Why did you choose that date?" "Can't you trust 
me?" Dick betrays himself. "I cheated, not Billy!" Jack's I. 
O. U. The Count plays his trump card. Doris repudiates Jack. 
"I am announcing my engagement to Count Cassavelli." 

Act III. — The Count's board bill. The Count discusses art and 
money with Elsie. "Stop your kidding. Count!" Ruth reveals her 
secret. "I think I love him!" Dick wins Ruth. Ted pleads with 
Barbara. "The Princess will not send away the Prince." Ta- 
bitha's revelation proves a surprise to the Count. "The truth, 
every word of it." The agreement. "And you will come to me." 
"On the Fifteenth of January!" 

T. S. DENISON & COMPANY, Publishers 

154 W. Randolph Street, CHICAGO 



The Kingdom of Heart's Content 

By LINDSEY BARBEE. 

Price, 25 Cents 

College comedy, 3 acts; 6 males, 12 females. Time, Zy^ hours. 
Scenes: Easy to set. 1 exterior, 1 interior. Characters: Tom 
Lansing, Miles Arden, law students. Sidney Hilton, a student card 
sharp. Billy Merrill, a little freshman. Ralph Lawrence, a foot- 
ball coach. The Burg'lai\ Millicent, in search of her Prince. 
Bloise, a devotee of art and adjectives. Gretchen, who wants to 
grow up Dixie, a Southern coed. Madge, Shirley, Frances, Amy, 
Pauline, Judith, other lively coeds. Mrs. Wiltaerton, Tom.'s aunt. 
Tilly, the German maid. 

SYNOPSIS. 

Act I.— Gretchen objects to being treated like a child. Virtues 
of strawberry pop. Golf and art. A novelist seeking inspiration. 
News of the Burglar. Miles mistaken for the Burglar. The rec- 
ognition. 

Act II. — Millicent seeking for a Prince to lead her "into the 
Kingdom of Heart's Content. Billy falls into evil ways. The trick 
play. Hilton steals it. Betrayal of the college team. The accusal. 
Tom admits his guilt to save Billy. Shunned and deserted. "Poor 
Milly." 

Act III. — Difficulties of love making. Amy indignant. "I'll 
stand by the team to the bitter end!" Blotter reveals the traitor. 
Hilton routed. Dixie surrenders her heart to Miles. Millicent 
finds her Prince. The college team's victory. All ends happily. 

A Collej^e Town 

By WALTER BEN HARE. 

Price, 25 Cents 

College farce comedy, 3 acts; 9 males, 8 females. Time, 2^A 
hours. Scenes: 2 interior, 1 exterior. Characters: Jimmie, a rah- 
rah boy. Tad, the college cut-up. Leviticus, the ace of spades. 
Major Kilpepper, head of the military. Popp, professor of phil- 
ology. Scotch, football captain. Shorty, the ubiquitous freshman. 
Billy, 'Of the Glee Club. Twiggs, of the faculty. Miss "Jim," 
the girl from Dixie. Marjorie, the college widow. Ma, a pop- 
ular landlady. Jane Cavendish, from Wall St. Mrs. Popp, a 
faculty type. Mrs. Stiles, a honeymooner. Miss Twiggs, a relic 
of other days. Mrs. Twiggs, a motherly old soul. 

SYNOPSIS. 

Act I. — Bight a. m. in a college boarding house. Marjorie, the 
ever blooming college widow. A college spread, pillow fight and 
quadrille. "For the honor of old Bexley!" The fatal frat pin. 

Act 11.^ — "When one is on the faculty some things must be 
done sub rosa." "Howdy-do Prexy; isn't this a beamish even- 
ing?" The major proposes. The real Aunt Jane arrives. 

Act III. — The side lines at a foot ball game. "If the last half 
goes anything like this one, I'll have to write home to Grandma." 
The two Aunt Janes. "He's within a yard of the line." "For 
the honor of Bexley." Miss "Jim" remembers her promise. 



T. S. DENISON & COMPANY, Publishers 

154 W. Randolph Street, CHICAGO 



At the End of the Rainbow 

By LINDSEY BARBEE. 

Price, 25 Cents 

College comedy, 3 acts; 6 males, 14 females. Time, 21,4 hours. 
Scenes: Easy to set. 3 interiors. Characters: Robert Preston, a 
lawyer. Douglas Brown, a football player. Dick Preston, the 
groom. Stanley Palmer, "Hawkins, the butler." Ted Whitney, 
captain of the Varsity team. Jack Austin, Preston's secretary. 
Marion Dayton, a ward of Preston. Nellie Preston, a bride. Louise 
Ross, known as Miss Grayson. Phyllis Lane, a football enthu- 
siast. Kathleen Knox, chairman of the rushing committee. The 
Imp, a freshman. Emily Elliott, with a conscience. Jane, a 
maid with a taste for literature. Mrs. Brown, step-mother of 
Douglas Brown. Polly Price, Elsa Ernest, Marjorie Arnold, Marie 
Swift, Molly Bruce, of the Theta Phi. 

SYNOPSIS. 

Act I. — Ted's plea to Phyllis to help the college. The prom- 
ise. Nell comes to the rescue of Theta Phi. Mollie becomes a 
maid. Dick employs a butler. The agreement. "Douglas Brown 
will play!" 

Act II. — Maid and butler discuss affairs. The old story, "Hearts 
and Masks." The plot to steal the papers. The combination of 
the safe. The "Imp" makes a startling discovery. Marion's sac- 
rifice. 

Act III. — The football game. Louise betrays Phyllis. "I have 
lost him forever." The victory and jubilation. The "Imp" is in- 
dignant. "My wings haven't sprouted yet." Robert and Marion 
And "the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow." 

Everyyouth 

By HARRY L. NEWTON. 

Price, 25 Cents 

A moral fantasy in "< scenes; 7 males, 6 females. Time, 1!4 
hours. Scene: 1 simple interior. Characters: Everyyouth, Work, 
Vice, Pleasure, Care, Truth, Reason, Temptation, Conceit, Van- 
ity, Happiness, Trouble and Love. Plot: Everyyouth, a clerk in 
Somebody's office, quarrels with Work, the old bookkeeper, because 
he objects to his pal. Pleasure, with whom he attends the ball 
game during business hours. On account of this unpleasantness, 
Happiness, the faithful stenographer, leaves and the bewitching 
maidens. Temptation, Conceit and Vanity take her place, but they 
do not accomplish as much as she did alone. They become close 
friends of Everyyouth and he meets Vice and Care, easygoing 
chaps, who introduce him to Trouble. In the end Love, the maiden 
eternal, appears, wins him from evil ways and back to his real 
friends. Work, Reason, Truth and Happiness. Patterned after the 
old morality play, "Everyman," in a setting of today. Highly in- 
teresting story with a moral, yet with enough comedy to appeal to 
any kind of an audience. 

T. S. DENISON & COMPANY, Publishers 

154 W. Randolph Street, CHICAGO 






OCT n i^>^ 

A Rustic Romeo 

By WALTER BEN HARE. 

Price, 25 Cents 

A musical comedy in 2 acts, 10 males, 12 females. Only 5 
m. and 4 f. have lines. The rest are in the chorus. It can be 
played by 5 m., 4 f., eliminating the chorus. It will prove equally 
successful when produced without music. Time, 2^/4 hours. Scenes: 
1 exterior, 1 interior. Characters: John Jabe Doolittle, the would- 
be heart smasher of Chowderville. Hink Spinny, who peddle.s 
tinware, woodenware and hardware everywhere. Sid Roberts, whu 
longs for the "Great White Way." Azariah Figg, storekeeper. 
Grandpaw Blue, the oldest inhabitant. Evalina Tupper, the vil- 
lage belle. Miss Dee, a lovelorn critter. Mrs. Spriggs, looking 
for the third. Honeysuckle Spriggs, her little sunbeam. The 
Chowderville flre brigade and its charming society leaders, con- 
stitute the chorus. Contains ten exceptionally clever songs, hu- 
morous and sentimental. "I Want a Big- Town Girl" is set to 
original music. The remainder are sung to familiar college airs.. 
"Pretty Girls," "I'm Falling in Love Again," "Moonlight Sere- 
nade," "John Jabe's Wedding," "Over the Banister," "The Chow- 
der Fire Brigade," "Gay Manhattan," "Love's Waltz" and "On 
the Fourth of July." A most interesting plot wound about the 
events of a small town, which keeps one's interest keen until 
Figg finally locates his $70.00 and John Jabe gets a wife. This 
play is a decided novelty. Directions are given with the songs, 
explaining in detail how the chorus may be drilled to march, form 
figures, pictures, etc., which are very effective, yet in the range 
of amateurs. A clever stage director should make this show equal 
most metropolitan successes. Especially recommended for col- 
lege productions. Professional stage rights reserved and a royalty 
of five dollars required for amateur performance. 

SYNOPSIS. 

Act I. — Chowderville on a busy day. Honeysuckle and St. 
Cecelia astonish the rubes. The boy whose father was bad. "Do 
I look like a tall-grass sister?" Miss Dee, a lone, lorn critter, tells 
of the awfulness of the world. The village belle and the Rustic 
Romeo. "Girls, girls, girls!' A matrimonial advertisement from 
a clinging little blonde named Golden-haired Flossie. Hink Spin- 
ney tries to propose to Evalina. "If I only had $70!" Mrs. Spriggs 
astonishes the natives. "I'll make you think a Kansas tornado has 
struck your town." A moonlight serenade. The robbery. "Who 
stole my $70?" 

Act II. — John Jabe's hotel on the Fourth of July. A country 
wedding. Honeysuckle and the four rubes. "Skidoo is New York 
talk for scat." The Fairfield Road folks come to the wedding. 
Miss Dee's wedding present, a bottle of Miggins' Stomach Balm, 
good "fer every ailment in the human cistern." An unwilling 
bridegroom. Figg catches the thief — almost. The Chowder fire 
brigade. A suspicious bride with a temper. Deserted on her 
wedding morn. "We'll be as happy as two little twin cubebs." A 
double wedding and divided wedding presents. Figg recovers his 
$70. Patriotic finale: On the Fourth of July. 

"We played 'A Rustic Romeo' a few nights ago to a packed 
house. A dandy play for amateurs." — Tom Conley, Luling, Texas. 



T. S. DENISON & COMPANY, Publishers 

154 W. Randolph Street, CHICAGO 



DENISON'S ACTING PLAYS. 

Price 15 Cents Each, Postpaid. Unless Different Price is Given. 



M. F. 

Documentary Evidence, 25 min. 1 1 

Dude in a Cyclone, 20 min 4 2 

Family Strike, 20 min 3 3 

First-Class Hotel, 20 min 4 

For Love and Honor, 20 min.. 2 1 

Fudge arid a Burglar, 15 min.. S 
Fun in a Photograph Gallery, 

30 min 6 10 

Great Doughnut Corporation, 

30 min 3 5 

Great Medical Dispensary, 30 m. 6 
<lreat Pumpkin Case, 30 min. ..12 

Hans Von Smash, 30 min 4 3 

Happy Pair, 25 min i 1 1 

I'm Not Mesilf at All, 25 min. 3 2 
Initiating a Granger, 25 min.. 8 

Irish Linen Peddler, 40 min... 3 3 

Is the Editor In? 20 min 4 2 

Kansas Immigrants, 20 min.... 5 1 

Men Not Wanted, 30 min 8 

Mike Donovan's Courtship, 15 m. 1 3 

Mother Goose's Goslings, 30 m. 7 9 

Mrs. Carver's Fancy Ball, 40 m. 4 3 
Mrs. Stubbins' Book Agent, 30 

min. 3 2 

My Lord in Livery, 1 hr 4 3 

My Neighbor's Wife, 45 min. ..33 

My Turn Next, 45 min 4 3 

My Wife's Relations, 1 hr 4 6 

Not a Man in the House, 40 m. 5 

Obstinate Family, 40 min 3 3 

Only Cold Tea, 20 min 3 3 

Outwitting the Colonel, 25 min. 3 2 

Pair of Lunatics, 20 min 1 1 

Patsy O'Wang, 35 min 4 3 

Pat, the Apothecary, 35 min... 6 2 

Persecuted Dutchman, 30 min.. 6 3 

Regular Fix, 35 min 6 4 

Rough Diamond, 40 min 4 I 

Second Childhood, 15 min 2 2 

Slasher and Crasher, 50 min... 5 2 

Taking Father's Place, 30 min.. 5 3 

Taming a Tiger, 30 min 3 

That Rascal Pat, 30 min 3 2 

Those Red Envelopes, 25 min. 4 4 
Too Much of a Good Thing, 45 

min. . . . , 3 6 

Treasure from Egypt, 45 min. 4 1 

Turn Him Out, 35 min 3 2 

Two Aunts and a Photo, 20 m. . 4 

Two Bonnycastles, 45 min 3 3 

Two Gentlemen in a Fix, IS m, 2 

Two Ghosts in White, 20 min.. 8 

Two of a Kind, 40 min 2 3 

Uncle Dick's Mistake, 20 min.. 3 2 

Wanted a Correspondent, 45 m. 4 4 

Wanted a Hero, 20 min 1 1 

Which Will He Marry? 20 min. 2 8 

Who Is Who? 40 min 3 2 

Wide Enough for Two, 45 min. 5 2 

Wrong Baby, 25 min.... 8 

Yankee Peddler, 1 hr 7 3 



VAUDEVILLE SKETCHES. IV.ON- 
OLOGUES. ETHIOPIAN PLAYS. 

M. F. 

Ax'in' Her Father, 25 min 2 3 

Booster Club of Blackville, 25 m.lO 
Breakfast Food for Two, 20 m.. 1 1 

Cold Finish, 15 min 2 1 

Coon Creek Courtship, 15 min.. 1 1 
Coontown Thirteen Club, 25 m. 14 

Counterfeit Bills, 20 min 1 1 

Doings of a Dude, 20 min 2 1 

Dutch Cocktail, 20 min 2 

Five Minutes from Yell College, 

15 min 2 

For Reform, 20 min ,4 

Fresh Timothy Hay, 20 min... 2 1 
Glickman, the Glazier, 25 min.. 1 1 
Handy Andy (Negro), 12 min.. 2 

Her Hero, 20 min 1 1 

Hey, Rube! 15 min 1 

Home Run, 15 min 1 1 

Hot Air, 25 min 2 1 

Jumbo Jum, 30 min 4 3 

Little Red School House, :0 m. 4 

Love and Lather, 35 min 3 2 

Marriage and After, 10 min... 1 
Mischievous Nigger, 25 min... 4 2 

Mistaken Miss, 20 min 1 1 

Mr. and Mrs. Fido, 20 min 1 1 

Mr. Badger's Uppers, 40 min.. 4 2 
One Sweetheart for Two, 20 m. 2 
Oshkosh Next Week, 20 min.. 4 

Oyster Stew, 10 min. 2 

Pete Yansen's Gurl's Moder, 10 

min 1 

Pickles for Two, 15 min 2 

Pooh Bah of Peacetown, 35 min. 2 2 
Prof. Black's Funnygraph, IS m. 6 

Recruiting Office, 15 min 2 

Sham Doctor, 10 min 4 

Si and I, 15 min 

Special Sale, 15 min 2 

Stage Struck Darky, 10 min... 2 
Sunny Son of Italy, 15 min... 1 

Time Table, 20 min 1 

Tramp and the Actress, 20 min. 1 
Troubled by Ghosts, 10 min... 4 
Troubles of Rozinski, 15 min.. 1 
Two Jay Detectives, 15 min... 3 

Umbrella Mender, 15 min 2 

Uncle Bill at the Vaudeville, 15 

min 1 

Uncle Jeff, 25 min 5 

Who Gits de Reward? 30 min.. 5 



A ireat nnmber of 

Standard and Amateur Plays 

not found here are listed in 

Denlson's Cataloiiue. 



T. S. DENISON & COMPANY. 154 W. Bandolph St.» Chicago 






LIBRARY OF CONGRESS 



l*OPULAR ENTERTAINIV^ 

Price, Illustrated Paper Covers, 2 



H 




014 457 598 2 




IN this Series 
are found 
books touching 
every feature 
in the enter 
tainment field 
Finely made, 
good paper 
clear print and 
each book has 
an attractive 
individual cov- 
er design. 



DIALOGUES 

All Sorts of Dialoiiues. 

Selected, fine for older pupils. 
Catchy Comic Dialogues. 

New, clever; for young people. 
Children's Comic Dialoiiues. 

From six to eleven years of age. 
Dialogues from Dickens. 

Thirteen selections. 
The Friday Afternoon Dialoiiues. 

50,000 copies sold. 
From Tots to Teens. 

Dialogues and recitations. 
Lively Dialogues. 

For all ages; mostly humorous. 
When the Lessons are Over. 

Dialogues, drills, plays. 
Wide Awake Dialogues. 

Brand new, original, successful. 

SPEAKERS. MONOLOGUES 

Choice Pieces for little People. 

A child's speaker. 

The Comic Entertainer. 

Recitations, monologues, dialogues. 

Dialect Readings. 

Irish, Dutch, Negro, Scotch, etc. 

The Favorite Speaker. 

Choice prose and poetry. 

The Friday Afternoon Speaker. 
For pupils of all ages. 

Humorous Monologues. 
Particularly for ladies. 

Monologues for Youn^ Folks. 
Clever, humorous, original. 

The Patriotic Speaker. 

Master thoughts of masterminds. 

The Poetical Entertainer. 
For reading or speaking. 

Pomes ov the Peepul. 

Wit, humor, satire; funny poems. 

Scrap-Book Recitations. 

Choice collections, pathetic, hu- 
morous, descriptive, prose, poe- 
try. 14 Nos., per No. 25c. 



DRILLS 

The Best Drill Book. 

Very popular drills and marches. 
The Favorite Book of Drills. 

Drills that sparkle with originality. 
Little Plays With Drills. 

For children from 6 to 11 years. 
The Surprise Drill Book. 

Fresh, novel, drills and marches. 

SPECIALTIES 

The Boys' Entertainer. 

Monologues, dialogues, drills. 
Children's Party Book. 

Plans, invitations, decorations, 

games. 
The Days We Celebrate. 

Entertainments for all the holidays. 
Good Things for Christmas. 

Recitations, dialogues, drills. 
The Little Folks, or Work and Play. 

A gem of a book. 
Little Folks' Budget. 

Easy pieces to speak, songs. 
One Hundred Entertainments. 

New parlor diversions, socials. 
Patriotic Celebrations. 

Great variety of material. 
Pranks and Pastimes. 

Parlor games for children. 
Shadow Pictures, Pantomimes, 

Charades, and how to prepare. 
Tableaux and Scenic ReadiniEs. 

New and novel; for all ages. 
Twinkling Finders and Swaying 

Figures. For little tots. 
Yuletide Entertainments. 

A choice Christmas collection. 

HAND BOOHS 

Thu Debater's Handbook. 

Bound only in cloth, 50e. 
Everybody's Letter Writer. 

A handy manual. 
Good Manners. 

Etiquette in brief form. 
Private Theatricals. 

How to put on plays. 
Social Card Games. 

Complete in brief form. 

MINSTRELS. JOKES 

Black American Joker. 

Minstrels' and end men's gags. 
A Bundle of Burnt Cork Comedy. 

Monologues , stump speeches.etc. 
Lautfhiand, via the Ha-Ha Route. 

A merry trip for fun tourists. 
Nefiro Minstrels. 

All about the business. 
The New Jolly Jester. 

Funny stories, jokes, gags, etc. 

Lartfe Illustrated Catalogue Free. 



T. S. DENISON & COMPANY. PubUshers. 154 W. Randolph St., Chica^ 



